opinion by Barista 


Watch out! Got coffee here. Hot coffee! Very hot; hot, hot!

Behind you, Phil. Big pot of coffee coming through! Fresh coffee. Good coffee. Hot, hot coffee! Everybody watch your backs. Cassandra, James, Maddy—behind you!

No time for chit chat. Not while holding a steaming pot of delicious coffee—hot coffee! Very, very hot!

Customer gets what the customer wants. Large coffee, small coffee, decaf coffee, hot coffee!

Excuse me, let me just squeeze in here and—ahhhh! Fuck, spilled hot coffee on my finger; ow! Ow, ow! Shit! Not again! Burned myself on coffee; hot, hot coffee!

Grab some ice; don’t just fucking stand there, Cassandra! You’re a whore if I’ve ever seen one! Hot coffee!

Phil, what the fuck? You were supposed to watch your back! Hot, hot coffee! You are a hazard to this workplace! You need to learn to keep an eye out for the guy carrying the scorching pot of coffee! Hot, hot! Does it look like ice coffee to you? No; it is hot! Very hot; hot, hot, hot!

Now Phil, give me your hand so that you may pay with your flesh! Eye for an eye! Coffee for a coffee! Hot coffee! Hot, hot! Hot, hot, hot, hot; coffee—hot coffee! Hot!

Hi, welcome to Starbucks.